RØB Severson (jabberwocky) wrote,
RØB Severson

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Life Imitates...An Episode Of MR. BEAN?

This morning could only have been more ridiculous (and loud) if Boots Randolph had been in my house playing "Yakety Sax" over and over again. To prove just how comfortable I am with what an idiot I can be, I'm totally not even making this entry friends-only.

I sleep in a loft bed, which upon first getting it meant that, when my alarm went off, I'd be up and at 'em. Nobody wants to climb a ladder to go back to bed for five minutes, or at least I don't. HOWEVER, of course my brain found a way to be lazy, and a very dangerous one: hit the snooze, and go into the living room to lay down on the couch 'til I hear the alarm going off again (I set it plenty loud enough to hear from the other room). It's not QUITE as loud from there, and I've been known to sleep through it, at least for awhile, before.

SO, to counteract this, at some point I started making a stop in the kitchen in order to put some water on for tea. The living room is between the kitchen and the bedroom, so at some point within the 8 minutes or thereabouts that would follow, wherein I'd be sleeping on the couch, either the tea-whistle or the alarm radio, or some combination of the two in a cacophonous rage, would awaken me with some ease.

This morning, for the first time ever, I not only slept through the alarm, but the tea-whistle, too. For a good several minutes. However long it took for all of the water in the teakettle to boil off completely. When I'd earlier picked up the teakettle to make sure there was water inside of it, I noted that it was particularly heavy with water, in fact.

Before I knew what was up, an alarm was sounding. Having only recently had installed a Brinks home security system, and having been inclined to teach myself the ins and outs thereof recently, I went immediately to it. I couldn't figure out what was wrong--I'd turned off the alarm (which I set while I sleep, and for which there is a motion detector that picks up any activity in the living room, but not the hallway to my room or the kitchen) on my way into the kitchen initially. I entered my code, and went through all of the procedures that have worked hundreds of times before already, to turn it off. Nothing worked. I saw that I was actually turning the system ON when I'd enter my code. So, I'd enter it again and again, and it just got turned on and off. On and off. But the alarm never stopped.

After entering my code a handful of times, I realized the alarm was not coming from the Brinks speaker, but from nearer the kitchen. The smoke alarm? But I hadn't smelled/seen any smoke...and my house is cozy enough that I feel as though I would have.

I guess the reaction of the heat with the metal kettle, untempered by the water within, was enough to emit some kinda fumes, fumes capable of setting off the smoke alarm. I quickly grabbed it down and managed to silence it. At this point I realized the teakettle was completely empty, blackened from the stovetop and the corresponding heat. I set about scrubbing some of the blackness off, rinsing out the kettle, and so forth. It took a good several minutes to do this AND re-set the kettle so that I actually had some hot water for my tea. Once I'd set the kettle back up to boil me some new water, and knowing fully that at this point I was awakened enough to not feel as though I should sleep further, I proceeded back into my bedroom to get ready for my day while waiting for the water to come to a boil.

I stepped into the front room/living room area and immediately heard another deafening alarm; this one even worse than the first. Of course, in my earlier panic to turn off the the smoke alarm, I had abandoned the Brinks console precisely after turning the alarm back ON, rather than off. So, one trigger of the motion sensor and it was all bells and whistles again. I managed to cancel out the alarm swiftly and with ease, all the while wondering just what the hell my new roommate thought of all the gall-durn'd siren-oriented commotion going on downstairs--if anything--and considering myself lucky that she didn't come down demanding to know why the heck I was apparently trying to interrupt her rest with any opportunity: Tea-whistle, alarm clock radio, smoke alarm, house alarm.

In conclusion: I think I need more sleep. Seriously, Mr. Bean had mornings less ridiculous than this. Idea for a quick short?
Tags: alarm, annoying, film, house, i'm dumb, morning, pphq, security system, sleep, staying up late

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