August 4th, 2004


Something's Wrong, Something's Happened

Poll #330890 Yer Own Personal WebMD

Since last night, my skin is tingly, my muscles don't want to work properly, I have bodily fatigue all over, I have mild and sporadic headaches, and periodic half-dull stomach pain, and frequent nausea. What's wrong with me?

It's food poisoning. That chicken (or perhaps that Cappucino cake) you ate last night wasn't thoroughly cooked.
Since you just started lifting weights, and your body is entirely un-used to doing anything physical, it's reacting violently.
You've contracted diabetes; your worst fears have come true.
It's because you went like 8½ days without a shower, then washed away all the resistance your body had built up to things in a shower yesterday morning.
Just a run-of-the-mill cold/flu virus, my dogg. Stay the course.
That kid who got West Nile Virus in St. Clair county? Well, it's your turn now.
Maybe it's appendicitis setting in. Soon now, you'll get that sharp killer pain in yer side, just like Steve Urkel did on FAMILY MATTERS so many years ago.

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